again.

16 06 2017

healing is a life-long process.
even though there are
pieces of my soul i have fully
surrendered,
the enemy knows us well.
he knows how to slip those
thoughts and things back
into our fingertips.

as the waves of sadness
and doubts came this week;
i chose to focus on them.
i chose to allow myself
to float in this sea of
grief and sadness.
i chose to feel the waves
pound over me again and again.

it’s been day four of these waves.
i’ve dreamt every night of them,
i’ve woken up in tears
with a heartache so deep,
i could see nothing through my tears.

and then He spoke.

i’ve kept asking Him
why? why this?
why these specific waves?
why this sadness?
i already surrendered it –
why am i back in it?

and in a calm and quiet way,
He slowed my heart down
and told me i needed these waves
to come and go consistently.
{which in my head i think is
SUPER crappy of Him to do!}

but i need them to come
because He wants to show me
He will bring me safely 
back to shore
again
and again
and again
and again.


He is not leaving me in the
violent waves to be mean.
He wants me to cry out to
Him,
and allow HIM to be my peace
in the midst of it,
and not only calm
the raging seas,
but to bring me back to shore.
to Him.
to His embrace.
to His safety.
to His presence.
to HIS LOVE.
to His grace.
to His peace.
to His J O Y.

my friends,
we are all riding out
our own waves,
and weathering our own storms;

but hear this tonight —
He will always be faithful.
His faithfulness is to YOU.

sleep well my friends.
may we always continue
to remember,
the waves will end,
and we will always be brought
back to the shore safely.

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