shattered Pt II

31 01 2014

I have to process
out loud.
I just need to ramble,
and in the process
of getting my words
out,
and someone to just
simply listen-
I begin to see
things clearly.

I have spent a
life-time trying
to build my own self,
an image of something
good or worthy.
But I built it all with
my own ‘strength’
and Jesus is being
so very gracious,
and SMASHING
every single little piece
of that image.

And though it hurts,
and it’s probably
one of the most
painful places….
the only place I can
go from here,
is up.

He will be picking
up the pieces.
He will be putting them
back together,
and better.
He will be bringing me
out of this place
of utter brokenness.
He will be the light in
the darkness.

He will get
all
the
glory. 

And if anything,
that in itself-
is absolutely beautiful
and worth it…

Jesus,
I have never in my life
felt such intense
heart-ache and pain
as I have during this time.
I don’t ask that you
take it away.
I don’t ask that you erase
it all.
I don’t ask for it
to be different…

But I do ask,
something of You,
that I know I will get.
I ask that you fulfill
Your promise You gave

“And He who began a 
  good work in you,
will Himself, bring to
completion on the day
of Christ Jesus…” 
           Phil 1:6

Yes,
you started all of
this simply by
giving me life 26 years
ago…. and You will
do as you choose,
and one day,
that eternal hope will
be fulfilled.

Don’t let go,
I know you won’t
but I still have
to ask…

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