20 05 2012

I used to journal in one journal at a time, with the same color ink. Everything was completely uniform even in the way I wrote the dates and the way I started my journals.

Over the last few years, i do not journal as much but when I do,  I now journal, pray, do my bible study, write little snippets here and there all in the same journal. Many different colors and the dates are written different, if written at all.

I am enjoying this ‘freedom’ in writing. I scribble and doodle with different inks all over my notebook. Usually because I get sidetracked and get bored writing. Yesterday I was flipping through my old spiral and found this little random blurb scribbled at the bottom of a page. I thought it connected well with this post.

you’ve opened the page
and shed the new light
all the tiny little rays
illuminate the night.
the darkness splattered within
as I try and understand
the newness of walking in this skin 

I wrote it after I had written down all the obvious sins that are in my life that I need to run to Jesus with.

So. Not. Easy.

This battle with sin seems never-ending at times. Sometimes I get sad that I look back at these journals and still seem to struggle with sin. But I also look back, and see God has grown me in some way, shape or form. And I am so very thankful for that.

“I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,’ and you forgave the iniquity of my sin….” Psalm 32:5 (this entire chapter is one of my top two favorites in the Bible)




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