25 04 2012

And then many will fall awayand betray one another and hate one another. And many false prophets will arise and lead many astray. And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold.” Matthew 24:10-12

Don’t lose heart.

It is as simple as that. I find myself in a very raw season of noticing my friendships not continuing to grow in Christ. One or the other is growing with him, but never the both of us; in community. And that is painful for me.

I hate losing friends, but… I also can’t continue to slip in and out of this mediocrity. I’ll be so very honest… I change. I change with who I am around. I don’t change between my non-believer friends and my believer friends. I change between my lukewarm friends and my friends who are running hard after Christ.

The last two years I’ve been growing like crazy. I slip and fall all the time. Constantly actually. I feel like I find myself in the desert… all the time. I constantly struggle with feeling like I’m alone. Even when I’m surrounded by family and people, I still feel alone in this journey. My closest friends over the last few years, I am watching them slowly, ever so slowly slip away.

It is like this… slow process. A few changes here and there. Attending church less and less. The Bible sits on the shelf more and more and collects dust. We throw a prayer here and there when we really want something. Selfishly. There’s a conversation here or there mentioning God, but the reality is…

God knows your heart. He knows the ones who are absolutely pursuing His heart and Kingdom, while fighting against the grip of sin. I mean, fighting. Not just admitting a struggle here and there.

God knows your heart.

To me, that is quite frightening and humbly all at once.

One day, I, as well as yourself, will be standing before the King of Kings, the Creator and absolute Ruler over all. The God of wrath and justice is real. His unquenchable love for his children is real. One day, we will all stand before Him, completely stripped of all we are. Stripped of the families we have, the jobs, the cars, the macbooks and iphones, our ministry, our bible studies and churches.

We will be alone. Before God.

And He knows.

He knows if you are truly a follower of His. He knows if you passionately were pursuing His will and fighting to help win souls for the Kingdom.

That doesn’t mean that you were a preacher or missionary. It doesn’t mean that you never had a bad day, or traveled through the lonely desert. Passionately pursuing Christ doesn’t mean that the world knew your name, it doesn’t mean that you didn’t doubt God or question Him.

A passionate follower of Christ means that you did your heart-wrenching best. You sought to know him, and no matter what circumstance or challenge was given to you; you turned it back to Him. And you continued on.

Don’t be a quitter. Don’t give up. Don’t change your moral standards. Don’t quit fighting against sin. Don’t leave your church unless you are truly looking for another one. Don’t quit reading your Bible. Don’t quit questioning God and sharing your doubts with Him. He’s big enough for those! He created us in such a way that we would not be able to fully grasp Him, and in such a way that we would turn to him and seek Him. Don’t lose your joy through the trials.

My heart is heavy for those who have quit… who have stood still along the way. Who have chosen to give up. Who have chosen to say ‘mediocre isn’t too bad’. My heart is heavy for those who renounce His name with their life… maybe not with their lips, but with their hearts and actions… it’s the same thing.


Keep fighting. There is something greater in store.

He promises…




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